Sientir's Blog

I've been finding myself particularly drawn to stories of adventure, where a group of 3-5 people come together in common cause, and through their journey, form unbreakable bonds of friendship. It's a common occurrence in a lot of media and is part of the broader concept of "found family"—that is, the family you find journeying through life, rather than the family you were born into. As the old (oft-misunderstood due to being abridged) saying goes, "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb." The reason I've been drawn to such stories is because I have a common human desire for comradery: I want companions, a group that lives life together. My problem is that I'm a somewhat introverted homebody who also works from home. While I do thankfully live with my biological family (which spares me some amount of loneliness, especially as I get along well with my sister), and I have a number of social activities that help, none of these th

The changing of the year is both a time of looking back on the year that was and a time of looking forward to the year that lies before us. I think both practices are valuable, and I'm finding myself wanting to reflect on the major events of 2023, while also looking ahead to how I want to focus myself in 2024, with a particular intention towards building on and continuing the places of growth I experienced last year. Let's begin in the past, then look ahead to the future! Looking Back On 2023 As some of you may know, I have a Patreon , and for that Patreon, I write a daily diary entry I call Dear Patrons...  wherein I share events of the day and things I'm thinking about. I first write these up as a text document that I carefully name to give me a summary of something about that day that was important to me. This served as an excellent resource for reviewing this past year, and it meant I didn't have to try to rely on my memory. Indeed, there were many things I'd do

  In the classic video game The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time , the hero Link starts his adventure as a boy, but partway through his journey, he finds the legendary Master Sword. When he goes to draw the blade from its pedestal, he finds himself transported forward in time by seven years, when he’s the man worthy of wielding such a weapon. I’d played this game as a child, and I think I always sort of assumed that’s how becoming an adult worked, that a day would come when I’d go to sleep a boy and wake up a man. But that never happened, and thus for all of my adult life, I’ve struggled to understand what it means for me to be a man. Growing up, there were a few key things I learned about manhood, things I was taught directly or indirectly—much of it through cultural osmosis. I was taught that men are competent, providers and protectors, and that they’re big and strong. (Of course, there are also adult males who used their competence and strength for selfish ends that harm others in

  If virtue is a good thing, how is it that the pursuit of it causes so much pain and suffering? “Virtues” are the things—qualities and behaviors—that a society or culture deem to be Good. Virtue is how we earn a good reputation, social acceptance, and the praise and accolades of others, but perhaps more significantly, it’s how we protect ourselves: it wards away the threat of becoming an outcast or pariah. Different cultures do have their own sets of things that are considered virtues, though there are a few commonalities: being beautiful or attractive, having a respected job, going to a prestigious school, coming from a well-regarded family or region, and being wealthy are all examples of common virtues. Of course, what things cause someone to be seen as beautiful or attractive will be culturally dependent, what jobs are highly regraded may vary, as do other reputational markers (e.g. family, prestigious schools, etc.), and many cultures have other things they consider virtues be